Kieran Culkin’s Hilarious Roast of His Mother-in-Law

Kieran Culkin’s Hilarious Roast of His Mother-in-Law

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Thanks so much for being here. He left a three-week-old
baby to be here. So thank you. Congratulations. Thank you. It’s actually kind
of rough to do that. It’s only three nights
away from home, but. There is an upside to it,
which is I can finally complain about how tired I am. When I’m home, if I
even just let the words, like, oh, man, I’m tired, my
wife just gives me this like– this look that says I wake up
every 20 minutes to breastfeed. How dare you, sir. Yeah. So now I get to be on TV
talking about how tired I am. And I got like six hours
of sleep last night. Oh you poor thing.
which is luxurious. Yeah, it’s great. Thank you for being
here because we’ve been asking for you to be on. I’m a huge fan. So you’ve been
acting since five? So is Macaulay older
or younger than you? He’s two years older,
and we kind of started at the same time, I think. Look at you two. Oh, wow. So it’s a big family, right? So how many siblings
do you have? There are seven of us. Seven? And at some point, all of
us tried the acting bit. Now it’s pretty much
just me and Rory. Mac does some stuff
sometimes, too. Right. So does that make you– and
this is your first child, right? Yeah. OK. Yeah, and my mom’s
first grandchild. And actually, the grandmas
are in town visiting their first grandchild. And there’s sort of this like
unspoken competition going on about which one is more insane. [LAUGHTER] My mom clucks like a chicken. That’s kind of
just how she talks. She’s like, “Wait, what,
let’s, go, down, town, Nikki.” [CLUCKS LIKE CHICKEN] And then my wife’s
mother, I call her the “interrupting
goose” because she doesn’t listen to a word that I say. If I start talking,
it goes like this. I’ll be like, “I’m thinking
for lunch, we can go to–” [SQUAWKS] And I think she thinks she’s
saying “huh” or “what,” but I’m like, “If
you could just let me get to the end of my
sentence–” [SQUAWKS] [LAUGHTER] She’s nuts. She doesn’t listen
to a word I say. I’ll be in the
middle of a story. I love that she– I love the idea of her
watching this on TV right now, me roasting her. I’ll be in the
middle of a story, and I’m just about to
get to the punch line, and she’ll be like, “Look,
that’s my friend, Linda.” [LAUGHTER] Like, “Uh-huh?” “This is her apartment.” “Wait, does this have
to do with my story? Because I was–” [SQUAWKS] Listen, if you want to stay
longer it sounds like you can. Yeah, I might stretch this
out for a week until they’re– Maybe you want to stay
until they both leave. The crazy bird ladies get
out of the house, yeah. [SQUAWKS] [SQUAWKS] [SQUAWKS] I wanted to talk to you forever
because I just am a huge fan, and your character and– First of all, I have to ask,
is it all scripted or did they let you just play with things? It’s scripted, and it’s
very, very well-written. So they don’t have to
let us play around. But they do, they let us
just like mess about a bit. Sometimes like my wife will be
like, “That sounds like you. Was that your line?” I’m like, “I don’t
know anymore.” Right. The line is blurred
between Kieran and Roman sometimes that like, I have
to shut this piece of my brain off that’s going
to insult somebody. Because Roman, he has no filter. No, not at all. And I wonder why Roman
gets away with that. Because you’ve only been
slapped once by your father. In the show, yeah. Which was really like– it broke my heart because
it showed how small you are. Roman just was crushed by that. Yeah. I’m talking like
everybody knows the show, because everyone should. But explain what the show is. So it’s about a family– very rich family. The father’s self-made and he’s
run billion dollar industries. He’s a media mogul. And basically, he’s at an age
he’s probably going to retire, in which one of his kids is
maybe going to take over, who’s going to be in line. And as you watch the show,
you find that none of his kids are equipped to. No. Particularly this guy,
who just runs his mouth and has no idea
how to do his job. Yes. That’s who that character is. The show is so good. It’s so fascinating,
and especially after Sunday night’s episode. I don’t know where it’s going,
but it’s frightening and good. I didn’t see it yet. Yeah. I saw it this morning
and I watched it while I was working out
because I knew you were on. Because I missed
it Sunday night. Oh, it’s so good. Thank you so much. You’re fantastic. I love the show. And stay as long
as you want so you don’t have to go back to the– The crazy bird ladies. The season finale
of Succession– oh, it’s the season finale? Sunday at 9:00. Of course it is. Yes, it’s going to be– OK, it’s at 9:00 on HBO. We’ll be right back.

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