Annoying Orange – Lawyer Up (feat. Stawburry17 & Kevin Brueck)

Annoying Orange – Lawyer Up (feat. Stawburry17 & Kevin Brueck)

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– Bored, so bored. Dare I say, blasé? – Unhand me, you manless hand. – Hah, good one Cucumber. – Excuse me, what did you say to? – I said, “Good one, Cucumber.” Incidentally, should I continue
yelling, or would you rather use google closed captioning? Hilarious. – I do not want you to yell,
and I don’t want you to read your crappy captions,
and more importantly, I am not a cucumber, I am a zucchini. – Really? ‘Cause you
act just like an apple. – Nobody calls me Cucumber Apple. – Dude, I bet nobody calls you at all. He’s so lonely. – That’s it, I’m lawyering up. (dramatic tone) – Why? Is there a blizzard coming? Oh no, where’d I leave my long
johns, and my stocking cap, and my snowmobile? – [Franklin] Did somebody say lawyer? – No, although that would make more sense. – Name’s Franklin L. Spud, I
am a tater, and a litigator. – Great, I am Zucchini,
rhymes with Houdini, and that dofus called me a
Cucumber, and then an Apple, and then there was yelling, too. So, do I have a case? – And how, only question
is, do you wanna sue him, or do you wanna sue his pants off? – Pants off, pants off. – Joke’s on you losers,
I never wear pants. – Hey Orange, what’s shaking? – Eh, playing with a potty pickle and a potato alligator, you? – Signing for your deliveries. Know anybody that’d
wanna send you a piñata in the shape of a submarine? – Maybe, why do you ask? Wow! – Behold, the sub piñata. – So majestic, so mysterious,
best not to question, best to smash. (fighting grunts) Die sub piñata, die. Hey, that’s not candy, what is that? – What else would be in a
sub piñata, but subpoenas? – Little apple, there’s a storm acoming. You better go warm up my snowmobile. – You, what? – ‘Cause it’s time for me to layer up. – Did somebody say layer up? – That’s entirely possible. – ‘Cause I’m a three
layer dip, who happens to be a five star attorney. – Hmm, sounds too good to be true. Will you work on retainer? – You bet your bottom dollar I will. – Great, (noisy spit). – Whoa, should’ve held out
for some more bridge work, and a couple of crowns. – Hey, this shouldn’t be
like pulling teeth, dude. All I want to do is sue, sue, sue. – Just tell me who to sue,
and that’s what I’ll do. It’s even written right
here on my business card. – Let’s start with Mr. Benedict
Cumberbunch over there. – That’s not my name. – Talk to the three layered dip, ’cause the Orange ain’t listening. – We have attorney/condiment priviledge. – That’ll never stand up
in a food court of law. – That’s what your momma said, oh snap. – Oh no you didn’t. – Yesh, everybody’s all
lawyered up in here except me. Will no one look out for the little guy? – Did somebody say small fry? – Yes, you did, just now. – Yes, because that’s my
name, and all I wanna do is sue, sue, sue. – Hey, that’s my slogan. – Psh, so sue me. – I will, I am totally suing you. – Fine, good thing my
cousin is an attorney. – That’s right, prepare
to be counter sued, stay strong cuz, stay strong. – What, no, you’re my lawyer. You can’t be suing other people. – I can and I will, and
if you don’t like it, you can sue me. – Fine, hey dip, you got
time for another case? – No, try my partner, but I’ll warn you, he’s only a two layer dip. (goofy laughter) – Forget that, looks like
I’m just going to have to represent myself, pro bolo. (everyone exclaims) – With a tie like that,
I could win any case. I’ll give you a thousand
dollars for that bolo. – Make it 5 thousand. – 10 thousand. – The bolo is not for sale. However, my legal services are. – 50 thousand dollars. – 60 thousand. – 100 grand. – [Candy bars] two hundred grand. – A million dollars. – Alright, we got a million,
that’s a million dollars, one with six zeros, million
dollars, do I have two? – Oh come on, is this the justice system, or is this just an auction? – Eh, potato, potahto,
it’s the same thing really. – Mainly, it’s about the billable hours. – If only there was some way to cut through all the red tape. – Oh, tell me about it. – That would take a real litigator. – A really real litigator. – Did somebody say, “Litigator?” – Yep, just now, why’d you ask? (moist munching) – Wow, I guess all we really
needed was a little gator aid. – You know, I think being a
cold blooded reptile is really what makes him a great lawyer. – How dare you call me a lawyer,
that’s it, I’m gonna sue. (burp) – Talk about habeas corpus. (plucky banjo)

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